SHECH 人｜STORY 忍 REN: The Power of Restraint
SHECH 人｜STORY
忍 REN: The Power of Restraint
Today’s guest on SHECH 人｜STORY is a dear friend of mine for many years — KB.
KB was my colleague during our days at Intel. He remains one of the most exceptional cross-border Programme Managers (PM) I’ve ever known—always rigorous, highly efficient, and chasing nothing short of perfection. It had been over ten years since we last saw each other. Traveling across the border from Hong Kong, my friends Betty, Qianqian, and I headed all the way north to Suzhou, just for this reunion – a meeting to talk about "change" and "constancy."
From Corporate Director to Head Chef
KB is a Malaysian Chinese born in the beautiful city of Penang. Educated from Oklahoma State University and holding an MBA from Fudan University in Shanghai, he carries Penang’s signature warmth and friendly charm, while naturally retaining the sharp, decisive edge of a tech executive.
For the past ten-plus years, KB lived the high-stakes corporate life at the Suzhou Science Park, serving as a Director in Microsoft’s hardware division. Yet, amidst the hyper-competitive wave of the domestic tech world, he chose to make an elegant pivot. Today, he is both the owner and the head chef of KAMPUNG BOY KITCHEN, a Malaysian restaurant in Suzhou.
Watching him put on his apron and hand-fold these beautifully pleated Malaysian dumplings almost made my jaw drop – especially since I’m someone who completely fails at cooking. Betty and Qianqian ate with pure joy, unable to stop praising the flavours. Since I follow a vegetarian diet, KB specially prepared a handmade chilled jelly dessert for me. It tasted like pure, simple sweetness. KB raised his glass with a smile and said, “Cooking good food, sharing a little wine, and just observing the diners – this is the romance in and ordinary life. ”
From "Selling a Dream" to "Serving a Taste"
The shift from being a “Fortune 500 Executive” managing over 40 suppliers – where you are constantly catered to and called “Boss” by everyone – to being a restaurant owner serving customers personally, inevitably brought a sharp sense of contrast.
KB admitted that this change in roles wasn’t easy to adjust to at first. In the corporate world, life was all about managing upwards and downwards, and daily “selling a grand vision” – a dream for others, and for himself. After years of that fast-paced, high intensity rhythm, one can easily become numb. Back then, “Endurance” (Ren) meant quietly putting up with the vanity and restlessness of the corporate ladder.
But now, his most fulfilling moments happen when diners show up right on time, feeling like they’ve come home. Knowing they are here for that specific, authentic curry or those dumplings – the true taste of home – and seeing the pure satisfaction in their eyes and the smile on their faces brings him a deep sense of pride and peace.
The "Disenchantment" of Friendship
The path of transformation isn't always lined with flowers. KB spoke of a decade-long friendship that ended abruptly. Following a disagreement, he stepped down as a partner in the restaurant, and once the final payment was settled, the friend chose to delete him entirely. Ten years of friendship, completely gone. KB felt a profound sense of sadness and confusion: Could the friendship and trust built over so many years really end just like this?
At that moment, I couldn’t help but think of the word my friend Betty mentioned:
"Disenchantment."
Perhaps KB is right in this special phase – shedding the halo of a Big Tech Director and leaving behind the superficial, interest-driven networking of adult social circles. In life, some people spend their lives chasing ultimate success and fame, while others crave more diverse ways of living. Regardless of the path, the ultimate lesson is learning to “let go.” Once you truly let go, perhaps you no longer need to consciously “endure.” (忍Ren)
A Blade Over the Heart, Light Within the Soul
When it was time to say goodbye, the rain was coming down quite hard, and the early summer night in Suzhou felt a bit chilly.
KB pulled up the hood of his jacket, zipped it up, and stood there quietly in the rain, watching us get into the car. The air was damp and heavy with the thick scent of locust flowers. In that exact moment, he said, “Thank you so much for coming to Suzhou to see me!” He gave us a smile and waved. Watching his tall silhouette gradually fade into the rain made me realize what it truly means to “strip away everything and return to your true self.”
So many people spend over twenty years charging ahead in their careers, constantly levelling up and fighting battles, reaching the high-light peak of their life’s first curve. Then, they hit all kinds of bottlenecks, experiencing massive internal struggles. But KB was able to step down from the peak of his corporate career. He stripped away the executive title, the power, and the look of admiration from others. He put down all that weight, took a leap into the second curve of his life, and just chose to be himself again.
“忍” (rěn) — Endurance / The power of Restraint
The Chinese character is composed of "Blade" (刃) on top and "Heart" (心) at the bottom.
A blade suspended directly over the heart, yet the heart remains unshaken.
It is neither cowardice nor mere resignation. It is the rare ability to remain clear-headed and composed amidst intense pain, pressure, and grievance. It means having the power to strike back yet choosing restraint; having emotions surge within, yet remaining perfectly calm; having a grand goal ahead, and being willing to wait patiently in the silence for the right moment.
To commemorate this wisdom, we will take the character "忍" hand-written by KB and craft it into a unique SHECH jewellery piece. Stamped with the official Fully Hallmarked certification in London, it will carry the timeless weight of a friendship that transcends both time and space, to be gifted to KB.
A blade over the heart, but light within the soul.
忍 (Ren) is a quiet, formidable power.
It is the strength to keep moving forward with confidence, even while carrying the scars of the journey.
SHECH 人｜STORY
忍 · 小不忍则乱大谋
今天《SHECH 人｜STORY》的嘉宾，是我相识多年的老友 —— KB。
他是当年我在 Intel 时的同事，也是我见过最优秀的跨国项目经理（PM）之一。严谨、高效、近乎完美。转眼十多年未见，跨越山海，我和好友小贝、谦谦从香港启程，一路向北抵达苏州，只为赴一场关于“变”与“守” 的重逢。
从科技总监到掌勺大厨
KB 是马来西亚华人，出生在美丽的槟城，美国学成、复旦 MBA。他身上带着槟城特有的温暖与友善，却又自带一种职场精英的利落范儿。
这过去十多年，KB 在苏州科技园，曾任微软（Microsoft）硬件部总监。在职场最“卷”的浪潮中，他选择优雅转身。现在的他，是马来西亚餐厅 “甘榜小厨 KAMPUNG BOY KITCHEN” 的老板，也是亲自操刀的主厨。
看着他戴着围裙，亲手包着花边精致的马来西亚饺子，我这个“厨艺小白”差点惊掉了下巴。小贝和谦谦乐呵呵地吃着，赞不绝口。我吃素，KB 亲手制作了冰冻果冻甜点，品尝到了生活的清甜。KB 举起酒杯，笑着说：“做做菜，喝点酒，观察一下食客，这是平淡生活中的浪漫”
曾经的“画饼”，现在的“味道”
从管理 40 多家供应商、被乙方簇拥的“世界500强高管”、 到亲自服务客人的“老板”，落差是必然的。
KB 坦言，这种角色的变化，刚开始并不适应。曾经在职场中，向上管理、向下兼容，每天都在“画大饼”—— 画给别人看，也画给自己吃。习惯了这种快节奏，高强度，人会变得麻木。那时候的“忍”，是忍下职场的浮躁与虚妄。
而现在，他最满意的瞬间，是看到食客像回家一样准时出现在店里。为了那一口地道的咖喱，为了那个家的味道，食客眼中的满足和脸上的笑容，成了他内心最欣慰的骄傲。
友情的“祛魅”与忍的智慧
转型之路并非全是花香。KB 提到一段长达十年的友谊，在意见不合，退出餐馆合伙人，结清最后一笔款项后，对方选择彻底将他删除。十年情谊，从此灰飞烟灭。KB 感到前所未有的伤心与迷茫：这么多年累积的友情和信任，竟也会如此吗？
这时，我不由想起朋友小贝提到的一个词汇：“祛魅”。
KB 正处在这个特殊阶段 —— 褪去了名企总监的光环，褪去了社交生活中“利益至上”的虚伪。人的一生，有人追求极致的功成名就，有人渴望体验更多元的活法。无论哪种，最终都要学会“放下”。当你真正放下了，或许就不再需要刻意地去“忍”了。
心上有刀，x中有光
临别时，雨下的有些大，苏州初夏的雨夜还是有些凉。
KB 把衣服后面的帽子拉起戴上，拉好衣服拉链，静静地站立在雨中目送我们上车。空气中弥漫着浓浓的槐花香，湿漉漉的，在这一刻，他说，谢谢你们来苏州看我啊！他微笑着挥挥手，那个在雨中逐渐远去的高大身影，仿佛让我看到了什么是 “卸下一切，返璞归真” 。
有多少人，他们在职场驰骋二十多年，一路升级打怪，完成了人生的职业第一曲线的高光时刻。然后，遭遇各种瓶颈，经历了翻江倒海的心态变化，从职场的高峰退下来，卸掉高管，卸掉权力，卸掉仰望，把一切卸下，步入人生的第二曲线，回归到“做自己”。
“忍” (rěn)
上为“刃”，代表锋利的刀口；下为“心”，代表灵魂与意志。
刀悬于心，却不乱于心。
这不是懦弱或退让，而是在剧烈的痛感与压力中，依然保持清醒的克制。是有能力反击，却选择控制；是有情绪翻涌，却仍能从容；是有宏大目标，更愿意在寂静中等待时机。
为了纪念这份智慧，我们会将 KB 亲手写的这个“忍”字，雕琢成一件独一无二的 SHECH 珠宝作品。它将在英国伦敦完成完整的贵金属官方印记（Fully Hallmarked），承载这份跨越时间与空间的友谊，寄给 KB。
心上有刀，心中有光。
忍，是一种安静而强大的力量。🌿
即使带着伤痕，却依然选择坚定前行。
SHECH 人｜STORY
Timeless beauty, quietly told
古老的美，从不喧哗
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